Markovic Estates Reserve Pinot Noir

Year: 2008
Cork: Synthetic
Alcohol content: 12.5%
Cost: $9.99

Kristina says: I had high hopes for Markovic, based entirely on the label. It said “Reserve” twice on the front and once on the back label. It also had a lot of French on there, boasting “Semi Dry Vin du Pays d’Oc” which I believe translates to something like “Country Wine of Oc.” Now, I don’t know where Oc is, but I have a pretty good idea that it is nowhere I ever want to be. Upon further research, I find that Country Wine is above Table Wine in the French wine ranking system. God help us if we ever accidentally ingest the Vin de Table d’Oc.


Mike says: Seeing as this is a French Wine it seems somehow appropriate to describe it the way a brain-dead American lout might.
Lout Mike say: Nice surrender-wine French, man this wine is so fuckin’ lame. It says it tastes like strawberries and white flowers. How faggy is that? This wine really taste like ass, batteries, and ass, in that order. Am I right? YEAH!


Overall Rating: Twice the cost of Tinsdale and twice as crappy.

Tisdale No listed year (A wine for the ages!) 12.0% alcohol synthetic cork. 2 for $9.99 (a bargain!)

Kristina Says:

Tisdale lured us in from the bargain wines with it’s quality label graphic design (and two for ten dollar price tag). Sadly, you cannot judge a book by its cover and you shouldn’t judge a wine by its label (no matter how often you read about that study where the wine enthusiasts rated cheap wine better when it was served in an expensive-looking bottle). Tisdale claims to have “blackberry and plum” flavors, but tastes more like wine that has been left open on the kitchen table all night after a party, drank only because it would be a shame to pour it down the drain.

Mike Says:

Tisdale is the Kris of red wines, neither dry nor sweet, neither mild, nor strong, and despite its lofty label claims, it is neither blackberry nor plum. However 4 bucks and change for bottle? Sign me up. I’ll say this; Tinsdale is worlds better than the drain cleaner 90% of churches serve at communion. This assessment comes from the school of thought that no flavor is better than bad flavor

Kris 2007 Pinot Grigio - Italy, 12.5 % alcohol, screw top, $7.99

Mike Says:

Kris has almost no flavor but finishes with a pleasant white wine after-taste. Without the after-taste, drinking Kris would be no different than drinking water. Kris is basically not even there. In the highschool of wine, Kris is the wine that you forget is even in the classroom after roll is called. It’s too lame to hang with the cool kids, and too uninteresting to for the jocks to pick on.

Kristina Says:

First of all, let me comment on how very, very odd it is to discuss a wine bearing my own name. I wish I could say “Kris is great” and “Kris is bold” and “Kris is not pathetic in the least.” Unfortunately, I am compelled to agree with Mike: Kris is too lame to hang with the cool kids (just like in real life). That said, I found my namesake to be pretty bland, but drinkable. It would pair well with buttered pasta, cream of wheat, or unflavored gelatin.

Over all we rate this wine: Inoffensive, in that it presented no specific offense.